Many couples get through their first year just fine, but issues often begin to surface in the second year that weren’t there in the past. Many people are very flexible in the infancy of a relationship, but as time goes by they become less flexible.By taking things slow and easy you give your relationship time to grow up and you get to see how the person will really treat you. As you get to know a person based on the areas listed above, you shape a picture in your mind of what this person is like. “Trust is a picture in your mind that tells you what that person will do when you are not around,” Van Epp says.This includes chemistry as well as any expression of touch from hand-holding to giving a hug to complete openness.Sexual involvement tends to create a feeling of really knowing somebody when in fact you don’t know them at all.Providing real tools for real relationships means we hear a ton of really amazing stories.Here are a few people who chose to connect with First Things First and feel the joy of healthy relationships.You should not marry a person and suddenly find out new things about them. Van Epp, reliance can be overcharged by sexual involvement.Couples who are sexually active prior to marriage often say they can depend and rely on each other, but the feeling of closeness is really fed by the sexual chemistry not true knowledge about the person.
As a relationship grows, it has different definitions. Friends have a low level of commitment, whereas best friends have a higher level of commitment to each other and soul mates have the highest level of commitment.
Becoming sexually intimate outside of marriage can cloud the picture of the person you are dating to a point that you miss very important warning signs.“Like Jennie, many people think that living with a person will tell you everything about another person,” Van Epp asserts.
“Perhaps you do get to know things about a person that you might not know if you weren’t rooming with them, but there is a cost involved.
and he calls at exactly 5 p.m., in your mind you think, ‘He did what he said he was going to do, therefore I can trust him.’ With that you begin to fill in the gaps in the trust equation that the person is trustworthy to do what they said they would do.” After three months of dating, Jennie felt like she could trust Kevin. “He didn’t try anything, which really impressed me because most guys try to make a move on you the first time you go out. It seemed like the ‘adult’ thing to do if we were considering marriage, which we had talked about several times.”Dr.
Van Epp cautions that you must be careful not to over-exaggerate what a person has done and draw the conclusion that the person is trustworthy. Just because a person has certain characteristics that you like does not mean that they are trustworthy.